Memos from the Middle

Smack-Dab in the Middle of Motherhood

5 Things I Should Have Considered before Getting Pregnant Again

It's all going to work out. Just breathe!Image from yahoo.com

Advice to Self: It’s all going to work out. Just breathe!
Image from yahoo.com

5.     It’s a heck of a lot harder being pregnant post-30 than pre-30.
Pre-30 Comment: “You have such a wonderful glow about you.”
Post-30 Comment: “You look really, really tired.”
Pre-30 Comment: “Oh, you have such a healthy appetite. Isn’t that cute?”
Post-30 Comment: “Remember, it’s not as easy to lose it now that you’re older.”

4.     Pre-existing children complicate pregnancy exponentially. Must they really point out every change my body is making?
“What’s with all that fur on your body, Mommy? It’s like a werewolf!”

3.     I have forgotten how to be the mother of an infant.
“So I can’t turn on Netflix for the new baby when I want to get a quick nap, huh?”
“Get real! Diapers cost how much now! Did the recession end and just pass by my house?”

2.     The adults are going to be outnumbered.
“Mommy, I am really good a plussing.”
“You are?”
“Yes. There are going to be three children and two adults. It’s going to be more of us and less of you. Isn’t that great?”

1.     I still haven’t fully potty trained the kids I have.
“Are you kidding me? Get in here and flush this toilet, young lady! What exactly did you eat today anyway? My goodness!”

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